Tempest Blown with the Wind #3 March 4, MMIX Loading IO.SYS... < Salute, pilots from Wing X, Wing Commander Domi , Commodore TBA (¿?) and last but not least TIE Corps Commander Jarek La'an >
Welcome to this, my third Weekly Report for my beloved Squadron, the mighty Tempest! The Mighty Tempest, "The Riders on the Storm". First of all, gentlemen, please accept my most sincere apologies for my delay with this report, but it was MSE time and I hope you'll be able to understand that I had tons of lines to write in order to award you the nothingness you deserve. ^_^ No, seriously, your performance last month has been splendid and you can expect something good coming from that one. Anyways, now I have 2 options: either I make one of those classic reports of mine, with way too much content, very few useful info and even less true facts... and it sorta merges with the next one for it's Wednesday already (damn! -__-U) or I make a quick one and try to keep 'em coming in due time. And I hereby pick the third option: it will be a quick one with no useful info and so many lies that if you happen to find something here suspect to be true it will be just a funny coincidence. And what can I say about last week? Pilotfiles... a "phantom" Squadron-level competition which was already won almost before it started... the epic end of our own "The Aftermath of TIE"... excellent communication levels from all of you that make possible for us to think we really are part of something so great as this mighty Squadron of ours really is. And above everything else, insolence, imprudence, sassy behaviours coming to my inbox in a daily basis! Not wise, not wise by any means I tell you. And now it's time for you to pay... It's time for punishment! >:-D
Tempest has a new patch!! No, not that the ego-maniac Lt. Colonel from Wing VI was finally replaced by something more useful (that's on the pipeline). He actually created such uniform patch for us (and got an ISM for it), a little survey where ALL of you participated gave his version victory over MY cra... errr... version, and from now on it will be our one and only patch. You can contemplate and admire the thing right above the title of this very section. Yes, it's resized; for the full 256 x 256 version download TTT2 from its usual location at http://tempestkappa.isdchallenge.org/ttt_download.htm or look for it at Tempest Squadron website, "Chaos Gallery" section. And be ready for my bitter vengeance that shall come quick and merciless... ~>:_P Your CMDR was on fire that day and he came up with one of those Tempest-only comps. involving logic, a mind challenge! And soon after totally challengedhe was because the competition ended not even an hour after it was approved. Please all of you congratulate Colonel Nav'ric Trow, Tempest 1-4, for being the absolut winner of "I think therefore I lose" first edition, being also the only human being who managed to find the right answer; the rest of them either from our own Riders or people from other units were all very clever, but none of them completely correct. And stay tuned! because it's my intention to release more of these in days ahead. And *THIS* time I promise you I'll put a few days there between competition approval and starting time... :-P New FREE mission from those psychos at the TAC Office. I was one of its testers as TCS, but that doesn't necessarily mean it has to make sense. Judge yerselves! And good luck because sometimes 9 Z-95s going for your six with the worst intentions all at once are just way too many Z-95s going for your six with the worst intentions all at once... ;-) XvT-FREE 225: Derrick's Bounty by FA Anahorn Dempsey BoP EHSP main patch plus all its related loose ship patches have been made public for usage with the new EH Ship Patcher! You can find all them at the TC Patch Archive HERE. And take note that: A) You old .BAT patches are not useful anymore so YES, you NEED to install the new one or else. Next stop? TIE95 and TIECD patches, of course! But be patient, my subdits, because those still need a helluva work there for it seems the very battles must be modified for them to work. "The Aftermath of TIE" is now over. Please forward your most sincere congrats to Commander John T. Clark, Tempest 2-3, for he was the fiction winner getting a nice IS-BR for himself. And hunt me alive *IF* possible Colonel Dan Bonini, Tempest 1-2, for having dared to keep for himself each and every IS-BW available there as highscorer on each and every mission! Hmmmpffff... Oh, well, here you are the full results: http://tempest.isdchallenge.org/competitions/AftermathOfTIE/AftermathOfTIE_results.html But his evil and indecent deeds know no end!!! 0__+U Colonel Daniel, "The Dan®", was fool enough to make fun from me with his unbeliavable 1-minute mission on the first edition of "TACcy Speed Test" for another IS-SW. We'll see next time, buddy... ~¬¬ Aaaaaand... Lt. Commander Dunta Polo, Flight Leader of "The Heralds of Maelstrom", crowned his outstanding flying performance of last month achieving 2nd place on February "SP Ace of the TIE Corps" monthly edition. A very well deserved IS-SW, Commander. Impressive, and facing no less than 1337 COL Corrin there. Impressive indeed. Aaaaaand... No less impressive the flying activity of our own Lieutenant Sergeyli, Tempest 3-2, having achieved 3rd place right below LCM Polo on that very competition. 2 of our Riders among the first 3 places... not bad, not bad at all I'd say. And even then, not enough!! What about that 1st place, gentlemen?! Please don't tell me some Green Squadron pilot cannot be beaten by a single Rider! >;-J 2 new Tempest-only competitions for ya!! Two classics, what else? Nothing new, yet enough for you to get your monthly Iron Stars doing your best, not only for your Squadron but also for your mighty ship the ISDII Challenge, the one and only Imperial Star Destroyer ever where some Rebel Commando trying to hijack the ship (as if they would have a chance...) would be spotted 'cos it would be seen flying STRAIGHT, and the TIE Corps as a whole activity-wise. "Tempest Pilot of the Month" and "Tempest Student of the Month" available at Competitions Center HERE as of NOW! Do your best, pilots!! (btw, right now while I'm writing my weekly collection of bollocks they haven't been approved yet by the DEAN but I kinda *HOPE* they'll be ready now that you're reading...)
( Spoilers! Spoilers! Spoilers! Just a careful and calculated consideration on my end for you to think about: Now, if you happen to already have this: which one would be the next? Yep, either this: or even this with luck: Well, if you come to think as myself know that all of you are but very wrong... According to recent events, having already this: next one will be this: for a total of this: or this: or something.
Tempest February MSE already sent to our esteemed Wing Commander! Be ready, gentlemen, for you'll soon get what your activity and commitment along last month have earned for ye. Then again, mandatory nothingness and unhealthy fallout I tell you. MSEs from September '08 and October '08 still pending processing so it wouldn't be surprising if one of these days your deranged CMDR faints all of a sudden after seeing supposedly long forgotten merit medals arriving at some of your inboxes. :__| Yet another weekly Tempest website update, as usual. Don't forget to check the site often as one of your primary sources of useful information and bollocks of all kinds. All complaints are to be sent directly to Fleet Admiral Jarek La'an, TIE Corps Commander, with the subject: "LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ah, you're still there, Sir. Just checking. ^_^" Sooooon... on next WSR and from then on you'll find here a couple of mini-boards with the updated results of Tempest PotM and SotM ongoing competitions. This way I'll be able to put you all on your nerves struggling and trying to beat your own Rider-comrades. Fraticide wars, yeah! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! >.-D------ "TAC's citation hunt"!! This is pure epic, let alone your chance of getting a nice IS-SW or even IS-GW for yerselves! Get up to 20 NEW Battle Citations for The Riders on the Storm for the silver thingie or up to 40 no less for the goldie one. You know the mechanics, gentlemen: Go HERE, find what battles are we closer to get the citation (we're 9 pilots so we're gonna need a minimum of 6 having flown any given battle) and... you know... FLY THEM!!! I'm counting on you and your commitment to Tempest Squadron for this one! :-D Right now we've a total of 0 new Battle Citations for March. Not good. You better start fixing this, and quick! >:-P
II.a) Squadron Competitions Tempest Pilot of the Month - March '09 Tempest Student of the Month - March '09 II.b) Wing / Ship Competitions Wing X Pilot of the Week/Month Challenge Top Gun II.c) Emperor's Hammer / TIE Corps / TC Battlegroups Competitions Oh! Oh my good Lord!! But if I'm going to repeat some TC site info here. Please, have mercy!! :-P SP Ace of the TIE Corps, March 2009 Dempsey's Music Video Mania TACcy Quotes TACcy Speed Test TAC's beta testing madness The TAC's citation hunt DJB's Inter-Club Training Event (Multiplayer!!) XWA Week of War CXVI (Multiplayer!!) III.) NO!! Performances involving the infamous trio (beer-holoTV-chips) don't count for anyone but CMDR here! III.a) Transfers / Promotions / Awards / Bribes
1-1 LC Zósite Kónstyte Styles
1-2 COL Daniel Bonini
1-4 COL Nav'ric Trow
2-1 LCM Dunta Polo
2-3 CM John T. Clark
3-1 CM Vitaru
3-2 LT Sergeyli
III.b) General Activity and other dreams alike ( Notation: Low/Crappy Activity Moderate Activity High/Very High Activity Insane Activity/BSF hate!! )
1-1 LC Zósite Kónstyte Styles
1-2 COL Daniel Bonini
1-4 COL Nav'ric Trow
2-1 LCM Dunta Polo
2-2 LC Murleen
2-3 CM John T. Clark
3-1 CM Vitaru
3-2 LT Sergeyli
3-3 CPT Alphafoxtrot1
IV.) Do it or DO IT. Don't even dare to try! (aka. Squadron Standing Orders)
Note on order 4: if you can't actually realize this IS NOT a RL way to go you should request transfer to the Redemption or something... ¬_¬
V.) Someone flew over the Ewok's Nest (aka. CMDR's Corner)
Everybody knows that Lt. CoRoneR Zósite K. Styles graphic skills start and end with "The Gimp". So far, only two skills have been used by The Wicked CMDR of Tempest: Skill A) Lame degrees of transparency everywhere, to the point that legend tells one of these days he'll turn himself transparent and everybody else happy. Skill B) Usage and abusage of all sorts of starfighter pics, none of them made by him, he can gather scavenging the HoloNet. Given these well proven facts, it's not surprising the recent survey on which would be the new official patch for Tempest Squadron ended with a tight result of 9-0 (even Zós voted against himself! :-P) for the version made by Lt. Colonel Tempest, former OPSA and suspected to be the main responsible behind "Tempest Tailoring Tool". But alas! The madman never surrenders and here we have him again trying for his pilots, the proud and skillful members of Tempest, to give him some feedback on yet another sacrilegious graphic attempt. <LC Zós> Hey, folks! Pay attention here for I've just made this splendid picture of Wing X Cantina for it to be hung right above the main entrance. As you can see, it features a classic yet bucolic scene of Wing X pilots having a good time while drinking as if there'd be no tomorrow and crawling on the floor as if there'd be no good manners. ^_^ <Tempest - {Zós}> ... ¬¬ ... <LC Zós> *ejem* Yes, well, I'd appreciate if you could give me some feedback here so I can modify whatever you think it needs to be modified. The picture is finished, yes, but I think it could accept a couple of little modificiations here and there if necessary. What do you think? CMDR Zósite leaves the picture under his pilots' judgment while he stands behind in silence. <LCM Polo> Ok, let's see... ummm... not bad. Well, I think it could do with some perspective but even then... <COL Dan> Zós' particular touch can be clearly appreciated everywhere. See? He made the bar transparent and... <CM Clark> Oh, come on, the guy does what he can. It's just that sometimes... <LC Zós> ... <CM Vitaru> Not that I can't appreciate the art enclosed on this picture but, we used to have more than 3 walls there, right? <COL Trow> Oh, given the "straightness" of its lines I thought that was some sort of curtain. <LT Sergeyli> And what about that lamp? Last time one of those things was used Empress Teta had pigtails AFAIK... <LC Zós> ... <CPT Alphafoxtrot1> Wait! Is that an Ewok? <LC Murleen> Very prolly. He's known to see furballs everywhere you know... <COL Dan> Nahhh, I think that's a dish supposed to go along with that jar. <CPT Alphafoxtrot1> Is that a jar?!! <LC Zós> ... <CM Vitaru> And... and... what's this? <LCM Polo> Dunno. Maybe the barman? <LT Sergeyli> Seems not a barman to me. It's more like some sort of bookcase and... <COL Trow> That's not a barman... it's a space station! :D <LC Murleen> No kidding. It resembles a Golan III Platform upside down. Suddenly Colonel Domi, Wing X Commander, appears on the corridor and approaches the little conclave. Everybody notices WC presence and salutes with respect. <COL Domi> Hello, gentlemen. What's up there? <LCM Polo> Well, Sir. It seems CMDR Zósite has just made this picture of our Wing Cantina and asked us for some feedback. Right now we were trying to unveil the nature of this particular thing over here you see... <COL Domi> You mean that curious piggy bank? <CM Vitaru> Now that you mention it... could be a racoon figurine... <CM Clark> On steroids? :-P <COL Domi> What about a lamp? <LT Sergeyli> No, Sir. We've agreed that archaic thing on the corner must be the lamp. <COL Domi> Wait, wait. What if we just ask Zós what's that? Everybody bows to WC's wise idea (not that they wouldn't have bowed if WC's idea would have involved Wing X pilots conquering Coruscant on their own armed with vibro-knives) and Colonel Domi uses his communicator to get a hold of LC Zósite who seems to have disappeared all of a sudden. <COL Domi> LC Zósite? Zós! This is Colonel Domi, my friend. Where the hell did you go? We're still here on the corridor near Tempest Quarters admiring your work but we would appreciate if you could come back and... <LC Zós [comm]> I'm here, people. And I take all of you are right there where I left you. <LCM Polo> Well, yessir. We were wondering if you could tell us what the... <LC Zós [comm]> Shut the hell up you!!! As I was telling you, I'm here; here at "Artillery" section, that's it. Right now I'm managing one of those fancy octuple barbette turbolaser cannons. Former assigned crewmen found themselves a little bit unable to manage it anymore due to some recent incident involving a scalpel and I took care of it, unscrewed it and mounted it again on the wrong side of the hull... <COL Domi> ZÓS!!! WTF?!!! 0_o <LC Zós [comm]> Now I'm aiming towards that very corridor I tell you! And you have 10 seconds... 10 SECONDS DO YA HEAR ME?!!! 10 SECONDS before I bring fire over the whole deck to tell me that thing on the picture is nothing but a chair. A %&·]} CHAIR AND NOTHING ELSE, OK?!!!!!! VI. Anyone get the number of that donkey cart??? (aka. FCHG and Combat Ratings) (Combat Ratings not yet implemented into the new database so it's not that they might be wrong. They WILL BE wrong.) Templar [TMPR] (5000 points) & Jedi 4th (500 points) [5955] & [509] LC Zósite Kónstyte Styles Centurion [CNTR] (2000 points) & Officer 4th (30 points) [2029] & [39] COL Daniel Bonini Aquilifer [AQFR] (500 points) & No rank (0 points) [688] & [0] CPT Alphafoxtrot1 Paladin [PLDN] (300 points) & Trainee (1 point) [348] & [1] COL Nav'ric Trow Knight [KNGT] (250 points) & No rank (0 points) [255] & [0] LC Murleen Cavalier [CAVL] (150 points) & Trainee (1 point) [171] & [0] LT Sergeyli Dragoon [DRAG] (100 points) & No rank (0 points) [120] & [0] LCM Dunta Polo Fusilier [FUSL] (75 points) & Officer 4th (30 points) [98] & [32] CM Vitaru VII.) Operation [R]ound and Pound (aka. Squadron Roster & Citations) W-What?! You want me to paste here the Squadron Roster? Why?! You have it in the TC site... But! But!... TEMPEST SQUADRON OF WING X : Deep Strike FLIGHT I - TIE DEFENDER What? NO?!! (*sigh*) Ok... Ok... I got it...
TEMPEST SQUADRON OF WING X : Deep Strike FLIGHT I - TIE DEFENDER FLIGHT II - TIE ADVANCED FLIGHT III - MISSILE BOAT MK.I Squadron Citations: (further details will only come after actual battles are detailed on Squadron Roster at TC database, sorry) Respectfully NUTS in service: --- Zósite Kónstyte Styles, Lord of Moonlightshadow --- CMDR-COOA-TCS-PROF/LC Zosite Konstyte Styles/Tempest/Wing X/ISDII Challenge "There's good. And there's evil. And it's the Order what make us capable of differentiate between them. So, don't bother me judging my actions; if they're good or evil. I'm above both. I serve that ORDER."
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